Though I have bad days like everyone, the ratio of good days since living in Las Vegas far outweighs the bad. I’ve had so many happy days! Here I am. All by myself. In my car. Driving to the Las Vegas Athletic Club job interview-it’s an open interview, so anybody can go. It’s not like I’m special but I feel great. I feel great. The sun is shining. The mountains are showing off as usual. I look pretty in my black blouse and pencil skirt. I feel pretty. It’s a great, great day and there’s really no scientific explanation for it.
It’s coming from within. No external source has told me that I’m anything special. It’s coming from the inside. I have this light lifting me up.
I’ve started to get back to my own practice for the first time in several months. How amazing it felt; even if it was only 20 minutes of practice without a savasana (relaxation) or meditation at the end….um….it still counts! It was ME returning to my core, my passion, my joy. All good stuff!
My personal practice rekindled an aggressive romance with Ardha Chandrasana (Half-Moon pose) and Utthita Parsvakonasana (Revolved Side Angle Stretch). I love these poses! I’ve always been overtly fond of them. In fact, I might me the giddy school girl squealing in the back of class when an instructor guides the class into either these poses. They are uncommon at the classes here in Las Vegas.
I love Ardha Chandrasana because it allows me to BEAM like a star. I imagine that my lower abdomen is the center of a bicycle wheel, my arms and legs stretch long as if to be spokes from the center of the wheel. And I shine. Bright smile. Open heart. I shine. I release the pose into a forward fold (Uttanasana) and express my gratitude to the universe for inviting me to be so bold.
I love Utthita Parsvakonasana because it rings out blockages in my waistline. I remember struggling in this pose for many years much the way I struggle in Upavistha Konasana (seated wide angle pose) today. I blamed a layer of [non-existent] fat on my troubles. It wasn’t until an instructor suggested I lift my crown toward the ceiling, lengthening my spine, did I find the space to actually twist comfortably into the pose. To trust that behind me there was invisible support preventing me from toppling over.
I was overzealous with my attack….forging into the full pose without taking the preparatory steps to reach it. I take my time with it now. I ease into it like brownie batter. As my hips spread, and my spine spirals around, I feel a surge of relief coursing through me. Aaah.
Returning to a personal practice takes courage. It requires commitment and discipline and may seem scary and isolating. I cannot force it. I cannot derive “measurable goals” from it. I can only listen to my heart and let it lead the way. The heart appreciates such submission and rewards its subject wildly.
